Where Are You?

If you were to ask me if I would consider myself a morning person I would have to say no but I use to be. Somewhere along the way to twenty-four I lost my appreciation of the morning, and to be honest I am not sure why? Perhaps it might have been from the fact that in college I had to get up early for class some mornings and so those mornings that I did not have to wake up for class I rebelled by staying in bed as long as I could. I guess I need to force a revolution of my thinking. “Viva la révolution de ma pensée”, I know very little french but long live the revolution of my thinking is something I do, sorta. Sometimes I just need to rethink how I’m thinking, to stop making excuses and redefine why I do what I do.

This morning I started my day with coffee, a doughnut and some more coffee in my warm office sitting back in my much to large chair reading a book by Henri J.M. Nouwen. Henri was a former catholic priest and theology professor who spent his final years working with the mentally and physically disabled. I have read a few of this books and find his insites to be thought provoking and challenging to my spiritual growth.

As I was reading I came to this quote, “To live a disciplined life is to live in such a way that you want only to be where God is with you” (The Inner Voice of Love, pg 23). Sometimes in the morning when I wake up I ask myself “Where am I?” as I come to in the reality of the day. But perhaps there is a deeper question of “Do I find that where I am, God is there also?”. Thats a hard question that doesn’t come with a quick answer. Do I find myself in a place where God is?

Henri began this page in the book by writing, “When we experience a great need for human affection, you have to ask yourself whether the circumstances surrounding you and the people you are with are truly where God wants you to be” (pg 23). We all long for love, it’s a part of what makes us human but where we find that love is critical to how our lives are shaped and lived. We long for deep human affection and I believe God uses people to show us his love but are we really where God wants us to be?

I know from some of my experiences that I have been in places of great emptiness and there I just find a void of what my heart really needed. It’s hard to be in those places but we don’t have to stay there, there are times we fear change and fear being challenged to think differently. However, if we don’t ask the hard question of is this really where God wants me we may never move on.

This reminds me of Peter and how jesus called him to follow him. Peter had the choice to stay where he was and keep fishing all his life. He probably had a well established market for his fish, he had friends, family, and all the comforts

he could afford in the first century A.D. , but he had to stop and ask the question “Is this where God wants me to be, is this the place, are these the people, is this what I am suppose to do? I am sure Jesus saying come follow me threw him off his routine but Peter’s response was without hesitation, he moved to where God was and lived in a such a way that he wanted to be with Jesus.

Later when Jesus is walking on the water Peter ask’s jesus to call him out on the water, he wants to Go with jesus even if it’s scary and challenging. Peter was willing to Question whether being in the boat was where God wanted him to be or not? He was willing to trust that God was going to provide a way to walk on water. Each day we wake up and ask God is this where I am suppose to be today, if you want me out on the water call me there and I trust you will provide a way. We long deeply for love, we long even deeper to be where God is. Ask the hard questions, challenge your thinking and find out where God wants you to be. He is already there going before us we just have to get out of the boat.

 

-Caleb Ross Hunter

 

 

Memory, Mind and Moving Forward

 

“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things”- Colossians 3:2

 

Memory: (noun) “the power or process of reproducing or recalling what has been learned and retained especially through associative mechanisms”

 

Over the past few years I have acquired a growing fascination with the human brain. The thought that we think sometimes blows my mind. There is such complexity and mystery to the brain that anytime that I spend any amount of time at all contemplating it, I am blown away and in awe of how it all works, of course this leads me back to the very creator and engineer of this complexity.

As a group of friends and I were sitting in a house in Mebane, NC last night discussing some of the things that we were going through someone made the comment that “the fact that we can remember, or have the capacity for memory is an awesome blessing that God has given us.” In the context of our conversation we were discussing experiencing God and how often times, that is what our heart desires but we get discouraged because we go through times where we don’t feel him. And that is where memory comes in, in those times where we can’t seem to feel him, God has given us the memory of when we did.

Just yesterday I was looking back through some of my earlier blog posts and I found one that I wrote while still in college out in Kansas. In that blog I quoted Donnie Hinshaw who was the pastor of the church that I attended out there,

 

“To hope in something means the state of life you are in is a state of discontent”

 

In that sermon I remember him talking about living with a Holy Discontent. A discontent that says where I am is not where I always want to be, a “holy” discontent is when that discontent is focused on experiencing God and being in a relationship with him. Right now I would have to say I have a pretty holy discontent. Not because where I am at is a horrible place but for the fact that I want to know, experience and feel God more, then what I do right now. I can remember those time where God really moved in my life. Those times where what I was doing and how I was living was intentionally geared toward pursuing a relationship with him. Those moments moved me forward, allowed me to take risk and strengthened my trust in God.

I think sometimes we get these ideas that the life of a christian should be full of these mountain top experiences and everyday is going to be full of miracles. However, that is not how it works, granted we may have those mountain top moments where God blows our minds, but in reality God wants to be with us in every moment. God takes the mundane and fills it with meaning. Just look at the life of Jesus, the majority of his life was spent living with twelve men. He traveled around taking the daily things of life and teaching them with those things. He did miracles but there were days where he didn’t. He blew the disciples minds but there where times where they were confused because he wasn’t the Messiah that everyone was expecting. Jesus spent three years helping the disciples experience him and fill their minds with memories of his life with them, so that when he was gone they could share those memories with the rest of the world.

One of the things that really stands out to me about the early church is that they were in each others homes, they were building community, they were eating together so that they could share together in the memory of Jesus. At the last supper Jesus said “Remember me when you take this cup and eat this bread.” He didn’t just say this because he was going to the cross the next day he said this so that this moment would be written in the minds of his disciples, that they would remember all the moments they had with him and that memory would move them forward.

Moving forward. What I mean by this is that our minds have the capacity for an endless amount of memories. Jesus doesn’t just tell them to remember, but rather to go and make new memories, to go and make disciples. To go and live life with people just like he had lived life with them. The disciples could have just settled into the mundane. They could have just kept the memories to themselves and let those three years be the only memories they had with Christ. The apostle Peter even tried this by going back to being a fisherman after Jesus died, but Jesus showed up and reminded Peter of what he had taught him and asked him to do (John 21:15-25).

So what does this have to do with us. I think sometimes we settle for simply living off the memories of old rather then making new ones. In the context of the church I think this is why so many churches around america are on the verge of dying. They have stopped living, they have settled for the mundane, they say this is what we use to do and this is what we will always do and we can’t change. Those churches like to talk about the glory days, they like to talk about when all the pews were full and about all the things they use to do. They speak of these experiences like war stories, there is this feeling of it being a long, long time ago in totally different situation. What breaks my heart about this is that it leaves a feeling that there is no future, there is no hope, and any discontent there may be is a discontent for what once was rather then what could be.

We as human’s have this ability to get overwhelmed with what the world around us is doing. We focus so much on the crazy messed up world that we forget God, we forget we have experienced him, we forget he loved us, we forget he saved us, we forget how to be in relationship with him, we forget that church isn’t about the program, numbers or methods but about the people being in relationship with God and each other. We forget that we have the opportunity to experience him everyday. We forget we have hope. I believe churches will close their doors and they will figuratively dye because they refuse to move forward. A whole generation may wonder in the desert like the Israelites because they have a great fear of moving forward, a fear that experiencing God in a new way may challenge everything they know, a fear that everything might change, a fear that the new memory may be painful, hard and risky.

The memory of Jesus will moved forward not by the organized established church but by the people that are willing to say “the memories I have with God are not enough, I want more”. The people that are willing to move forward, pick up the cross and move toward Christ with the holy discontent, that where they are isn’t where God wants them to stay. I can say that is is a challenge for myself as well, I realized recently that I had been riding off of my memories of past experiences with Jesus and others rather then making new ones. I realized that I had settled with just being content with who I was and what I was doing, but when my wife pointed out something to me the other day that I need to change it challenged me to really look deep into my own heart and ask myself what I’m doing.

As I have thought about this I have tried to put this into a context of where I am at in life right now. Just this year I got married to a beautiful young woman that I love very much, it took a lot of risk on both of our parts to trust that this what we wanted for our lives. It forced us to change, it daily challenges us in the way that we live and how we see the world. I can’t live the same way I was living before I had a wife, I had been living alone, eating frozen pizzas and hamburgers, watching what I wanted to watch and doing whatever I wanted to do. Having a wife has made me realize how selfish that way of life is and providing for her and myself isn’t ever going to be easy but it’s totally worth it.

Another thing that I have realized recently is I can’t continue the relationship simply off of old memories. Where we are living is a whole new place from where we started dating, in almost every way. To strengthen our marriage we have to be intentional about creating new memories and doing the same things that we were doing while dating doesn’t always mean that much. We have to do new things, take new risks and say “what I know about you isn’t enough, I want to know you more.” Sometimes that is scary because that means we have to open up, be honest and move forward.

I have a holy discontent for life because I want to make new memories with God and those around me that I love. It starts with setting my mind on Christ. Setting my mind intentionally on pursuing a relationship and being willing to move forward. Right before the Colossians 3:2 passage Paul reminds the church at Colosse that they had been raised with Christ and Christ was seated at the right hand of God. In this he is reminding them that Jesus had already concurred death, he had already forgiven them, he had already saved them, and that setting their minds on things above was to set their minds on Jesus.

Going on from there Paul says in verse 3-4, “For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life, appears, then you will appear with him in glory”…

 

And in Verse 5… “Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature”…

 

Then he lists all these things that aren’t what we need as followers of Christ for we wont find him in those things and in contrast he writes in Verse 12-17… “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievance you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

 

Paul reminds the church that Jesus is their life and then he reminds them of what that looks like to live as if Christ really was their life. He encouraged them to continue in the future to live this way, to continue to experience what it means to be God’s chosen people. The memories we have with God should move us forward toward more. We have to ask the question is Jesus just a memory or a story I read about or is he alive, seated on the throne and is he my life?

 

Jesus is the way, the truth, and the Life.

 

I am discontent with anything short of Jesus being my life.

 

-Caleb Hunter

Who Do You Say I Am?

Our understanding of who God is and who we are drastically affects our understanding of who Christ is and why we need him”– David Platt (Radical pg 34)

Over the course of the past year as a youth pastor I have been trying to help my students get a better understand of Jesus by leading them through the life of Jesus. I think sometimes we focus so much on “the manger” and “the cross” that we miss out on how Jesus really lived his life. Don’t get me wrong, Jesus birth and death are important but we have to see the story as a whole to really grasp how significant both of those events are. I think many times as Christians we treat Jesus death and resurrection as really the only important things that happened, it’s like we open a novel and read only the part about the hero dying. That is important, but thats not everything.

I believe that the more that we read and study the life of Jesus, the day in and day out doings of Jesus, we will start to experience him in really and intimate way. It’s like when you read a well written novel you get emotional attached to the characters and you start to feel the pains, joys, struggles and change that they go through. You choose to be invested in the story, you choose to let yourself be swept away in what is going on.

Last year I read The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, I didn’t necessarily want to read it. The idea of kids killing each other honestly still makes me feel sick to my stomach, but my little sister convenience me to read it. As I started reading I went from having no interest to feeling emotionally invested in the story. Collins evoked emotions through the book that I didn’t want to feel. I found myself crying and cheering at times. I could have just avoided all this if I had just put off reading it. It’s easier to not read it then put myself through that, however, thinking about it now that is the same reason sometimes we put off reading the Bible. We put off reading the story of God’s relationship with humanity because we might be affected. We might change and feel things we didn’t want to, BUT isn’t that the point.

The Bible is the story of God’s relationship with humanity, a story that is full of conflict, struggle, and pain but it is also a story full of grace, love and redemption. Jesus life is part of that story, arguably the most vital part, so what is holding us back from opening the book and being invested in the story. I think maybe what holds us back is how we view Jesus. Let me explain by looking at Mark 8:11-30.

In the first eleven verses of Mark 8 Jesus fed four-thousand people with seven loaves of bread, there are a couple of things we can learn from that but the important one is that Jesus had compassion on the people. His motive for feeding the four-thousand was not to do a miracle or show off, it was simply to feed the hungry because he knew what it meant to be hungry. If we pick up the story in verse eleven it reads:

“11 Pharisees came and began to question Jesus. To test him, they asked him for a sign from heaven. 12 He sighed deeply and said, “Why does this generation ask for a sign? Truly I tell you, no sign will be given to it.” 13 Then he left them, got back into the boat and crossed to the other side.” Mark 8:11-13 (NIV)

Why would they come ask for a sign? It amazes me that the Pharisees would come to Jesus at this point in his life and ask for a sign, some miracle so that they might believe. When I read this I think Jesus was frustrated with them (He sighed deeply). He had just fed four-thousand people, before that he had healed a deaf and mute man, even before that he had fed five-thousand people with five loaves and two fish, he had walked on water, he had cast out evil spirits. Weren’t these things a sign enough for the pharisees. Of all people they should know right? The pharisees prided themselves in their study of the law and of Moses. They would have read the prophecies about the Messiah but they had their own ideas. Reading on…

“14 The disciples had forgotten to bring bread, except for one loaf they had with them in the boat. 15 “Be careful,” Jesus warned them. “Watch out for the yeast of the Pharisees and that of Herod.” 16 They discussed this with one another and said, “It is because we have no bread.”

17 Aware of their discussion, Jesus asked them: “Why are you talking about having no bread? Do you still not see or understand? Are your hearts hardened? 18 Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear? And don’t you remember? 19 When I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many basketfuls of pieces did you pick up?” “Twelve,” they replied. 20 “And when I broke the seven loaves for the four thousand, how many basketfuls of pieces did you pick up?” They answered, “Seven.” 21 He said to them, “Do you still not understand?”” -Mark 8:14-21 (NIV)

In this passage we find Jesus with his disciples, they have very little bread which makes me think the disciples were worrying about how they were going to get more and in that moment Jesus warned them. I use to read this and not really care to understand what Jesus meant by this but now it’s starting to make sense after reading N.T. Wrights commentary about this passage. Wright writes “Now Jesus speaks of ‘leaven’, not to warn the disciples about the wrong sort of bread, but to put them on their guard against the wrong sort of kingdom-vision (Mark for Everyone, pg 104).” As I thought of that I realize why Jesus used the word yeast to describe this to the disciples. See yeast is very small but very powerful, when it’s mixed in with flour and water it’s nearly impossible to get it out and it affects the whole loaf.

Jesus warns the disciples of the yeast of the pharisees and Herod. The reason for this is because the pharisees were looking for a Messiah that would come restore Israel politically and spiritually. To them this meant that the Messiah would come and overthrow the Roman’s and take the throne of David here on earth. Secondly, they thought the Messiah would restore the temple to it’s original glory like in the days of Solomon. The temple was central to their spirituality because it was the place God dwelled. That was their focus and it affected everything they thought and did. Thats why when Jesus came they weren’t convinced he was the Messiah because he wasn’t doing what they thought he was suppose to do.

Herod was concerned about his throne. He was a puppet king for the Romans and anyone he thought was a threat to Roman was a threat to him and his “kingdom”. Herod had already put John the baptist to death for speaking against him and I am sure that the stories of Jesus had made it to his ears. Herod wasn’t interested in knowing if Jesus was the Messiah, he was simply concerned about himself and making sure Jesus wasn’t a threat to him. I am sure the crowds that followed Jesus worried Herod, but he didn’t really want to know Jesus.

Jesus warns the disciples and then reminds them that they don’t have to worry about having enough bread. Jesus is almost sarcastically saying “Remember when… I fed five-thousand and four-thousand people with very little.” Right after this Jesus encounters a crowd that brings Jesus a blind man to be healed.

“22 They came to Bethsaida, and some people brought a blind man and begged Jesus to touch him. 23 He took the blind man by the hand and led him outside the village. When he had spit on the man’s eyes and put his hands on him, Jesus asked, “Do you see anything?” 24 He looked up and said, “I see people; they look like trees walking around.” 25 Once more Jesus put his hands on the man’s eyes. Then his eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly. 26 Jesus sent him home, saying, “Don’t even go into[a] the village.”

-Mark 8:22-26 (NIV)

This experience that Jesus has with the blind man has a few things that could be missed if we just read it as another healing. First, a crowd gathers bringing Jesus someone to heal, like many of the crowds before they might have had different motives, but Jesus actions speaks of his heart for people. Jesus didn’t just heal him right there in front of the crowd. He wasn’t about putting on a show or simply doing miracles because he could. Jesus took the man away, outside the village, away from the crowd. He didn’t say any magical words or forgive the guys sins, he simply took a little spit and rubbed the man’s eye. Then like an eye doctor would he asked him what he could see, finding that he didn’t have 20/20 vision Jesus touched him again giving him permanent contacts. He then just sends the man away.

The second thing I see in this is the kingdom-vision of the crowd and possibly the blind man. The crowd had come to see a show. They weren’t all concerned that Jesus might be the Messiah, they thought he was the greatest show on earth long before the Barnum and Bailey Circus. They wanted to see miracles. We see that also with the crowd of the four-thousand who followed Jesus for three days. After reading the stories of Jesus healing I always wonder what happened to the people he healed. How were their lives changed and what did they do after that experience. We don’t really know, some may have followed Jesus and others may not. For this reason I think for those that were healed they really might not have cared if Jesus was the Messiah. They might have seen Jesus as the healer, the best thing that ever happened to them, or the only doctor who really knew what he was doing.

Finally we come to Mark 8:27-30…

“27 Jesus and his disciples went on to the villages around Caesarea Philippi. On the way he asked them, “Who do people say I am?” 28 They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, one of the prophets.” 29 “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?” Peter answered, “You are the Messiah.” 30 Jesus warned them not to tell anyone about him” (NIV)

Here all those other things make sense, as if Mark is building everything to this climax, a question that Jesus asks “Who do you say I am?”. We just looked at the pharisees and how they thought Jesus might have just been a prophet or really good teacher or just a radical guy, because he didn’t fit their view of the Messiah and their Kingdom-vision. Then we looked at Herod and how he thought Jesus might just be another John the baptist, a crazy man who could draw a crowd, which was okay as long as he wasn’t a threat. Then the crowds and the blind man, who might have saw Jesus simply as Elijah come back from the dead because he could heal and do miracles.

But, who do you say I am? is Jesus question, not to them but to his disciples. Peter makes a really bold statement with his response “You are the Messiah”(vs.29). This was a bold statement because not even the pharisees who knew the law and the prophecies would say this. Herod wouldn’t believe it because Jesus would then be a threat. The crowd was to caught up in the show to care. However, Peter knew, he knew because he had been with Jesus he had experienced Jesus.

Peter and the disciples had something that none of the other people in these passages had. They had three years with Jesus. They had invested in being with him, they had given up a lot along the way but they had experienced life with Jesus. They hadn’t settled for waiting on the outside to see if Jesus was going to redeem Israel. Even though at times they got caught up in thinking like the pharisees and being wowed like the crowds the whole of their experiences with Jesus lead them to understand that he was the Messiah.

So what does that have to do with us? Well the first thing I think we have to ask ourselves is who do we say Jesus is? Do we know him well enough to even give a good answer? I believe that being a christian isn’t so much about when and where we prayed for Jesus to save us from our sins as it is about the process that we go through when we surrender our kingdom-vision and begin investing in knowing him. This means the relationship is important. Those three years Jesus had with his disciples were very important! Every moment we have with Jesus is important. Because the experiences we have with Jesus will help us answer that question.

Who do I say Jesus is? God started a relationship with humanity in the beginning, you and I are part of that humanity. When I realize that I am a part of humanity that God has created to have a relationship with I have a better understand of who I am. That this life isn’t about me it’s about my God and the relationship I have with him. Jesus is the only one that can restore that relationship, he is the redeemer, the Messiah. “Our understanding of who God is and who we are drastically affects our understanding of who Christ is and why we need him”– David Platt (Radical pg 34).

Think about this. I dare you to ask the question, “Who do I say Jesus is? Do I really believe he is who I say he is?

-Caleb Ross Hunter

10/8/2013